Sunday, January 4, 2015

The Great Breastfeeding Debate

Before I get started, I want to make it very clear... this is only my opinion and my story, I'm not saying one way of feeding your baby is better than the other. I honestly feel that whether you choose breast or formula or a combination moms are making their best choice for themselves and their baby. All the judging needs to stop.

I am almost 100% positive that everyone knows all the amazing benefits of breast feeding. Yes it is the best option, IF it works for you and your baby. Feeding your baby formula, will not kill them, it will not make them sickly and ruin their chances for the rest of their lives. Maybe formula does not have all of the benefits of breast feeding, but it will feed your child and give them the nutrients they need! Which HELLO is pretty important! 

When I was pregnant with KBeaner I was sure I was going to breastfeed, I was so excited to be able to do it, and give the best for my daughter. I had seen my sister with her son, she was a breastfeeding pro and it seemed to come so easily, I just assumed it was easy for everyone. No one really talks about it being difficult or that some people can't do it. 

After giving birth, they gave me KBeaner to breastfeed her, its odd because there are all these nurses grabbing at your breasts telling you how to hold the baby and position yourself. Of course it seemed like every nurse told me to do it differently. Everything seemed fine and then we left the hospital. 

KBeaner wasn't gaining enough weight and wasn't having a lot of wet diapers. I started pumping and attempting to breastfeed. Her pediatrician referred me to a local lactation consultant and nurse who would come to our house. That woman was amazing, she was so kind and supportive and helped me understand that just because I had to start supplementing with formula did not make me a bad mom.

I cried the day I gave KBeaner formula not because I was upset I was giving her formula but I realized how she was not thriving as well on breast feeding. I had never seen her so alert, I realized she was lethargic before. 

You see all these super glamorous pictures of celebs breast feeding, and even regular people breast feeding making it seem so easy. It's beautiful and does an amazing job promoting breast feeding but I feel like it  gives women an unrealistic expectation. 

You don't see PSAs talking about how some women cannot breast feed, or how they struggle with it, how no matter how hard they try sometimes it just does not work.

I tried to breastfeed, then pump and supplement with formula when she didn't seem to get enough for over a month, until I realized how depressed I was. I spoke with my doctor and decided that the best options for me and my daughter were to go on medication and to stop breastfeeding. I was upset but knew that me being depressed was not going to help anyone.

Fast forward almost five years and I have an incredibly healthy, happy, and intelligent daughter. I know now I made the best decision for her and myself. I wish that there was more information out there on how it's alright if you can't breastfeed, or even if you choose not to. It does not make you a horrible mother, you need to pick the best option for you and your family.

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